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Anger Management Strategies

When conflicts arise that are difficult to contain or that become destructive, beginning counselling in a safe and neutral environment can be a way to make sense of the many layers of what is happening.

The aim is to develop communication that is non-threatening and not blaming or manipulative.

To do this a degree of self-awareness is required to be developed in order to explain more clearly and honestly what is happening inside.

In the early stages of counselling, a number of anger management strategies may be looked at as a means of maintaining safety and taking the first steps to rebuilding trust.

Learning anger management strategies or attending a stopping violence course can be a useful way forward.

Although anger management is often directed at men, anger management strategies can also be of relevance to women. For women, it can be a way to understand their own anger and can also be useful to understand their partner’s anger.

In individual counselling or in a group setting it is possible to learn about:

  • The various ways that control may have been imposed
  • The impact on others of controlling behavior
  • Understanding one’s own early experiences in relation to others violent or controlling behavior
  • Learning to recognize one’s own early warning signs of building tension
  • Taking time out versus walking out
  • Understanding the confusion of feelings that can make up anger
  • Taking responsibility for one’s own feelings
  • Develop more understanding of a partner’s point of view and experience
  • Understanding the blocks to change
  • Understanding stereotyped gender expectations

Whilst it is important that the violent member of a relationship takes responsibility for his or her behaviour it is important to recognize that violence often occurs within a relationship. It is often the case that over time, something like a dysfunctional dance has developed between a couple that has become well entrenched.

It can also be helpful to make use of couple counselling to look at the relationship dynamics that precipitated the conflict. In this way both partners can make changes that add positively to the relationship for its long term health.

If you are worried that anger is an issue for you or someone close to you and would like to start to make changes you can contact Talking Therapy.

Book an Appointment

Call or email us on:

(03) 354 8045 info@talkingtherapy.co.nz